I thought it would be hard to (again) give up on social media for awhile. Admittedly, I peeked once or twice at Facebook last week to see if anyone had posted anything on my wall, but overall, December’s social media fast was affirmative in the way I wanted it to be. Meaning, I remembered that I can and SHOULD go without reliance on these sites more in my life. Before this fast, I found myself using the excuse of looking at Twitter and Facebook feeds incessantly. The habit of checking up on other people (that feeling of “What am I missing now that I haven’t been on here for two hours?”) was getting in the way of living an interesting life of my own. I know I’m not alone in this compulsive behavior: A new study from the Pew Research Center reveals 49% of Americans spend at least 3 hours a week on social-media sites. THREE HOURS A WEEK!
I’m glad this time of reflection came when it did, nearing year’s end as I think about goals for 2012. Coincidence or not, in the past week, my attention was drawn to features in several magazines on the very topic of social media. From Real Simple’s “Social Disgraces” to GQ’s “18 People You’re Scared of on Facebook,” everywhere I turned I was reminded of what annoys me most about social media and the ways I no longer want social media to control me.
Which leads me to my pledge for 2012 in all areas of social media:
That’s right….if it’s not an affirmation of someone, a bit of praise or good will, or a link to something fun or informative I want to share (the reasons I most found myself missing social media last week), then I’m NOT posting it.
I know this is just my own bit of personal advice, but I would love if some of my readers decided to “borrow” it and make this their own social media mantra for 2012. What tires me most are the tweets about Mondays (of which I’ve had a few myself, no lie), the “Why me?” attitudes so prevalent in social networking and the vague and off-putting messages so many people post on their Facebook walls (or as Real Simple describes it, “vaguebooking”).
I encourage you to give this a lot of thought in 2012 as I plan to do the same. Social media is here to stay—no ‘if’s about it. But let’s not allow these vehicles to negatively shape the way friends and followers see us, yeah? (A great exercise to gauge this: Take a few minutes to read back through your Facebook walls and Twitter feeds…it’ll say a lot about your character and how you’re spending your time online).
What about all of you? What’s YOUR most annoying social disgrace? How do YOU think you could use social media more effectively in your life? I know I still want to maintain a presence on both Facebook and Twitter because there is a lot I love about both platforms, especially popping in to “share” stuff or say hi with so many of my friends there. I just don’t want to let those presences control me! So I’ll be “fasting” again a few times in 2012 to keep this up and doing my best to live by the words above. If you aim to take a similar pledge or goal for yourself, let me know in the comments!
See more of Gail’s work at www.gailwernerphoto.com. Become a fan of Gail’s work on Facebook. Follow Gail on Twitter.
I pledge with you on this one Gail! As a matter of fact, I started this a while ago including deleting those toxic people on my friend’s list who ALWAYS had negative statuses. The world is already too stressful and complicated to allow those comments to enter our minds! I want positive and encouraging words therefore, I plan to do the same! Great post Gail. :)
Love your new approach! But for the record, I heart ‘vaguebooking.’ I love random and mysterious status updates from people. Makes me think, haha. I tried to join you in your FB fast, but I couldn’t resist. So I deactivated my account until further notice. It’s kinda the best thing that ever happened to me. No more living my life for external validation. I wouldn’t do this on a whim, especially since I’m a biz owner. But being booked for 2012 and having nothing to share biz-wise for now … it seemed like the time to take the plunge and see how things go. Day #4 starts tomorrow :)
LOVE the mantra! I’ve been trying to avoid posting status messages at all for the last couple of months and restricting myself to use my wall on FB only as a way to share interesting links that I come across or quotes that I find inspiring. I’ve also been trying to make it a point to message people rather than write on their walls as I find often that I care too much about other people reading what is supposed to be a personal message to a friend.
I am so with you, Gail! Social Media is GREAT and has SO many advantages but can so easily become a controlling and unhealthy presence in one’s life and I’m all for taking back control!
I am definitely going for this, even now! I, too, feel like I the negative element is such a drag and I don’t want to be a part of that for anybody else. I’m joining ya, Gail!
One of many reasons why we love you! Such a great reminder to use social media to spread happiness and optimism. The world always needs more of that! :)
I quit FB and Twitter this year and honestly have never been happier. It hasn’t affected my photography business… I’m just as busy as I ever was… and I have a lot more time in my life to DO things. :)
I also don’t have the “false friendships” that I did on FB and don’t have the yucky feelings of reading Twitter’s endless tweets full of self promotion.
I realize that those things are here to stay but that doesn’t mean that I have to participate. I’m much happier without them.
However, I love my blog and my blog friends. So… what does that mean? ;)
Vaguebooking! Great word! So true!
Yes, yes, more positive! I’m def. trying to monitor my negative stuff and of course, avoiding any talk of politics, vaccinations or circumcision! I love seeing happy families sharing the ins and the funny outs of their lives. I hate it when people say their kid is in the ER but then never update anything and leave everyone hanging. Either give enough details for people to help, or say nothing!
I do hate the humblebrags on Twitter or RT’s of other people’s compliments. Gag!
I do love Twitter though, it gives me the allusion that I see you more than I do!
Vaguebooking — like the term! My general rule seems to be 75% positive and interesting, 25% real/funny/truthful/etc. I generally look for honesty, humor, and interesting updates when I’m trying to find someone to follow. It’s so easy to get on the negative train though, especially with Twitter — it will run right away with you! I’ve had to stop multiple times and consider where I want to go with it, as you know!
I’m not even on Twitter yet, was debating whether or not I should, but I know I’m more than likely going to love it. lol. I have disabled my personal profile on FB, I found it too consuming, and way too negative. Some people are SOO narcisstic, and as much as I love everyone’s babies, I hated reading how many times a day they were nappy changing, or things to that nature!
I agree with posting only positive things to your business (or personal) page, good luck with it!
I listened to a show on NPR this week about how we’ve stopped thinking like used to. Analytically, that is. Someone called in and said they practice an internet sabbath. No internet on Sundays (or whatever day) and it’s caused them to have to think through questions rather than just Google everything. Very interesting and inspiring. Good luck with your social media goals!
SUCH a great post, gail. thanks for the food for thought. :) i often find myself falling into the trap of negativity. can come easily but it doesn’t have to be that way. taking the pledge to be more positive and encouraging…especially on the interwebs…in 2012!!! again, thank you so much for sharing! :D